The Book
by speedo fannypacker
Summary: Kakashi has lost his precious book and cannot get it back. Woe is him. What else should he decide on but to manipulate Naruto to do his dirty work for him?


"That'll be 2.50," an overweight teenager droned as he held out his hand expectantly at our favorite grey haired teacher. Kakashi handed him a five, told him to keep the change and walked out of the bookstore with his face shoved into the book. Eyes scanning it eagerly. He had only been waiting FOREVER until the next of the Paradise books came out. And by forever, I mean about 2 weeks, max.

Now normally, Kakashi would continue reading and strolling in a very casual, not to mention cool manor, I'd like to see you pull that kind of strolling off, but today was not normal. Today, Kakashi spotted one of the most attractive bandana's he had ever seen in his entire life.

Not only was it a bright shade of yelling it had orange stars painted on it. He HAD to have it. And with that he strolled casually into the store, purchased his bandana and walked out of the store empty handed. It wasn't until he was a couple of miles away from the store did he notice that he didn't have his precious book in his hands. This was going to be a problem.

Inuzuka Kiba was on his way home from his training when he unceremoniously tripped over something on the ground. Ouch. I think he broke his face.

But not really.

He picked the book up staring at the cover curiously, "Wonder who this belongs to," Kiba shrugged, "Oh well." And with that he continued running home completely unaware of the black blur that was following him!

SUSPENSE!

But not really.

He fingered the book in his pocket as he sprinted home with his awesome-ninja-speed and decided he wanted to take a look in the book. He glanced at the back cover to see if there was a summary, but nothing was there, so he slowly opened the book. But before he got to see the first a giant flash of lightning struck right in front of him, never mind the face that it was about 80 degrees at the time and the sun was shinning brightly. Kiba dropped the book into a river he was conveniently running by and watched it slightly discouraged as it floated downstream.

The black blur, which was actually Kakashi, cursed silently as he watched his beloved book fall into the stream. He resisted the urge to strangle that Kiba kid who had dropped it.

But he didn't.

'Cause that'd be mean.

Meanwhile, Hyuuga Neji, who was on his way to his teams training spot after a short break spotted something orange in the water he was slightly hesitant about retrieving it but in the end he decided to let the curiosity get the better of him. Picking up the now soaked book, he pocketed it and told himself he'd look at it after he was done training.

"Good afternoon students!" Gai blared, "I hope you all had a wonderful break! I missed you so!"

"Gai, we were only gone for 15 minutes," Tenten said.

"Fifteen long and horrid minutes!" Gai corrected her.

"Hey Neji, what's that in your pocket?" Lee asked spotting the wet spot on Neji's pants. But since Lee is mature, he will not tease Neji and accuse him of soiling his pants. But that doesn't mean other people can't do it!

"Did you pee in your pants?" Tenten asked.

"No," Neji glared at her and pulled out the book he found in the river.

"My goodness!" Gai slapped his cheeks, "That's Kakashi's book!"

"Is that what it is?" Neji held the book, which was now flopping around from the water damage.

"Do you know what kind of blackmail we could do with this?" Gai eyed the book hungrily.

"But Gai you said that blackmail was a sign of weakness," Lee said.

"We're making an exception!" Gai clarified.

"Oh, I guess its okay then," Lee was just too gullible.

"Look, I found it, so I'm keeping it," Neji said shoving the book back into his pocket. Having a bit of trouble from all the flopping the book was doing.

Flop, flop, flop…

"Whatever you do Neji, do NOT give that book back to Kakashi, got it?" Gai asked.

"Sure, whatever," Neji shrugged.

"Good! Let's train!"

Now let's zoom back in on the life of Hatake Kakashi and his wonderful yellow and orange bandana, which he still has on by the way.

He is currently sulking. And mourning the loose of his book.

His prrreshouuussee…

It would be okay to attack Gai and take the book back, but attacking a student was practically forbidden. What should he do?

What else? Make his students do the attacking for him! He flitted off in a blur to find his new favorite student, Naruto.

Fortunately, Naruto was pretty easy to spot in a crowd of people due to his neon jacket that he always wore. Which by the way clashed marvelously with his orange pants. I think Naruto has more of a fashion sense then me.

"Naruto!" Kakashi shouted at him once he caught up.

Naruto spun around as his eyes widened at the sight in front of him, "Oh my god! It's the seventh member of the village people!" he pointed at Kakashi's bandana with a look of sheer terror on his face. And then he looked at the person who was wearing the bandana, "Oh, it's just you Kakashi. Whew."

Normally, Kakashi would've taken that comment about the village people into serious offense, but right now he was too focused on his book, "Naruto. I need you to attack Neji for me and get my book back from him."

"You don't beat around the bush do you?" Naruto asked.

"No."

"Sorry. I can't attack Neji," Naruto said.

"What? What not!" Kakashi whined.

"Since we're "friends" now, I'm not allowed to attack him! That's what friends do!" Naruto said in a matter-of-factly tone. "Plus. You aren't supposed to promote violence, remember?"

Kakashi sighed exasperatedly, "You know what? Fine. I'll get Sasuke to do this. I know he's more than willing."

"What! You're picking Sasuke over me?" Naruto stomped his foot completely outraged.

"If you aren't going to do it then I'll just have won't I?" Kakashi asked.

"Fine! I'll do it. But I won't attack him. I'll just ask him for it," Naruto nodded his head, satisfied with that plan. Too bad he didn't know that it was practically a mission for Neji to protect that book.

"I really don't think that's going to work," Kakashi said skeptically.

"What kind of teacher are you? Aren't you supposed to be encouraging me?" Naruto pouted.

"No."

"Fine," with that Naruto went off to find Neji.

"Ey, Neji, wanna let me have that book you got there?" Naruto asked.

"No."

"Oh come on, I know you aren't interested in that kind of stuff," Naruto scoffed.

"And you are?"

"No. Well…Kakashi wants me to get it for you," Naruto said.

Kakashi almost fell out of the tree he was sitting in. Thanks Naruto, thanks for ruining the entire plan.

"More of a reason not to give it to you," Neji said.

"What do you have against Kakashi?"

"Nothing."

"Then why won't you give me that book?"

"It's an order."

"Okay. Lets try this again." Naruto backed about five steps away and walked up to Neji.

"LOOK! A monkey!" he pointed off into the horizon.

"Naruto. There aren't even any monkeys in this village."

"Um…one more time," Naruto backed away again.

"LOOK! It's Sasuke! And he's running around Naked!" Naruto shouted.

Neji spun around and asked, "Where!"

Naruto could only stand there utterly bewildered for a few seconds before he remembered that he needed that book. He snatched it out of Neji's hands and proceeded to run as fast as his legs could carry him.

That wasn't too far though.

He only got about 20 steps away before Lee popped out of nowhere and kung fu kicked him in the face, "Sorry Naruto! But I'm on strict orders from Gai!"

Naruto chased Lee around the town until his legs felt like jelly. Returning to the spot Kakashi said to meet he collapsed on the ground.

"Whoa. Naruto. What're you doing?" Kakashi asked.

"What do you mean what am I doing! Looking for you stupid book!" and then he spotted the brand spanking new book in Kakashi's hands.

"Oh. I just went ahead and got a new one. You never came back here," Kakashi said casually.

And with that, Naruto jumped on top of Kakashi and began to strangle him.


End file.
